J.S. Burton Blog

The ‘Sandwich Generation’ – Taking Care of Your Kids While Taking Care of Your Parents

“The sandwich generation” is the term given to adults who are raising children and simultaneously caring for elderly or infirm parents.  Your children are one piece of “bread,” your parents are the other piece of “bread,” and you are “sandwiched” into the middle.

Caring for parents at the same time as you care for your children, your spouse and your job is exhausting and will stretch every resource you have.  And what about caring for yourself? Not surprisingly, most sandwich generation caregivers let self-care fall to the bottom of the priorities list which may impair your ability to care for others.

Following are several tips for sandwich generation caregivers.

• Hold an all-family meeting regarding your parents. Involve your parents, your parents’ siblings, and your own siblings in a detailed conversation about the present and future.  If you can, make joint decisions about issues like who can physically care for your parents, who can contribute financially and how much, and who should have legal authority over your parents’ finances and health care decisions if they become unable to make decisions for themselves.  Your parents need to share all their financial and health care information with you in order for the family to make informed decisions.  Once you have that information, you can make a long-term financial plan.
• Hold another all-family meeting with your children and your parents.  If you are physically or financially taking care of your parents, talk about this honestly with your children.  Involve your parents in the conversation as well.  Talk – in an age-appropriate way – about the changes that your children will experience, both positive and challenging.
• Prioritize privacy.  With multiple family members living under one roof, privacy – for children, parents, and grandparents – is a must.  If it is not be feasible for every family member to have his or her own room, then find other ways to give everyone some guaranteed privacy.  “The living room is just for Grandma and Grandpa after dinner.”  “Our teenage daughter gets the downstairs bathroom for as long as she needs in the mornings.”
• Make family plans.  There are joys associated with having three generations under one roof.  Make the effort to get everyone together for outings and meals.  Perhaps each generation can choose an outing once a month.
• Make a financial plan, and don’t forget yourself.  Are your children headed to college?  Are you hoping to move your parents into an assisted living facility?  How does your retirement fund look?  If you are caring for your parents, your financial plan will almost certainly have to be revised.  Don’t leave yourself and your spouse out of the equation.  Make sure to set aside some funds for your own retirement while saving for college and elder health care.
• Revise your estate plan documents as necessary.  If you had named your parents guardians of your children in case of your death, you may need to find other guardians.  You may need to set up trusts for your parents as well as for your children.  If your parent was your power of attorney, you may have to designate a different person to act on your behalf.
• Seek out and accept help.  Help for the elderly is well organized in the United States.  Here are a few governmental and nonprofit resources:
  • www.benefitscheckup.org – Hosted by the National Council on Aging, this website is a one-stop shop for determining which federal, state and local benefits your parents may qualify for
  • www.eldercare.gov – Sponsored by the U.S. Administration on Aging
  • www.caremanager.org  -- National Association of Professional Geriatric Care Managers
  • www.nadsa.org – National Adult Day Services Association

The Basics of Conservatorships

Sometimes, bad things happen to good people. A tragic accident. A sudden, devastating illness. Have you ever wondered what would happen if a loved one became incapacitated and unable to take care of himself? While many associate incapacity with a comatose state, an individual, while technically functioning, may be considered incapacitated if he cannot communicate through speech or gestures and is unable sign a document, even with a mark. In some cases, an individual may have no trouble communicating, but may not be able to fully appreciate the consequences of their decisions and hence may be deemed to lack capacity. With proper incapacity planning which includes important legal documents such as a durable power of attorney, healthcare proxy and living will, the individuals named in such documents are empowered to make necessary financial and medial decisions on behalf of the incapacitated person without obtaining additional legal authorization.  Without proper incapacity planning documents, even a spouse or adult child cannot make financial and healthcare decisions on behalf of an incapacitated individual.  In such cases, a conservatorship (or guardianship) proceeding is necessary so that loved ones are able to provide for their financial and medical healthcare needs.

A conservatorship is a court proceeding where a judge appoints a responsible individual to take care of the adult in question and manage his or her finances and make medical decisions. The court appointed conservator will take over the care of the conservatee (disabled adult).  When appropriate, the court may designate an individual “conservator of the estate” to handle the disabled person’s financial needs and another person “conservator of the person” to manage his healthcare needs. One person can also serve as both. If you are planning to serve as someone’s financial conservator, be prepared to possibly post a bond that serves as a safeguard for the conservatee’s estate. Individual states have their own guidelines for conservators, so check your local rules for more information.  

To minimize the incidence of mismanagement or fraud, the court holds the conservator legally responsible for providing it with regular reports, called an accounting. Additionally, the conservator may not be able to make any major life or medical decisions without the court’s approval and consent. For example, if you have been named the conservator for a relative, you may not be able to sell his or her house without the approval of the court.

The best safeguard to avoid going through court to get a conservatorship, however, would be to establish a durable financial power of attorney, a power of attorney for healthcare, each authorizing a family member or trusted individual to act on your behalf in case of incapacity.  While your agents have a legal obligation to act in your best interest they won’t have to post an expensive bond either.  Make sure the power of attorney clearly states that it will be effective even if the principal becomes incapacitated.

I often emphasize the important role gifting plays in estate planning, but gifting is not always the most effective way to minimize estate taxes. Since we are coming up on the end of the year, when gifting tends to increase because of the holidays and the need to get things done this tax year, I thought it would be good to go over some examples of when gifting is not the best option. 

Gifting Highly Appreciated Assets 

One of the most common mistakes I see clients make is gifting away assets that have significantly appreciated in value.
Read more . . .

Foreseeing And Stopping Family Drama Over Estate Planning

Sometimes it is easy to predict that certain relatives are going to challenge an estate plan. Some of these troublemakers tip their hand by being too pushy, or nosey, or making un-called-for comments about the mental state of older relatives. Others make their demands more explicit. Earlier this year, a wealthy family in New York City made headlines when family members filed dueling lawsuits accusing one another of theft while their loved one lay dying.

Dueling Lawsuits

The Post reported that Emily Lemer sued her step-daughter and step-grandson, alleging they stole her husband Albert’s (their father/grandfather’s) will and stock certificates from her and Albert’s home.
Read more . . .

 

Will or Won’t? Things a Will Won’t (or Can’t) Do

 

Wills offer many benefits and are an important part of any estate plan, regardless of how much property you have. Your will can ensure that after death your property will be given to the loved ones you designate. If you have children, a will is necessary to designate a guardian for them. Without a will, the courts and probate laws will decide who inherits your property and who cares for your children. But there are certain things a will cannot accomplish.

A will has no effect on the distribution of certain types of property after your death. For example, if you own property in joint tenancy with another co-owner, your share of that property will automatically belong to the surviving joint tenant. Any contrary will provision would only be effective if all joint tenants died at the same time.

If you have named a beneficiary on your life insurance policy, those proceeds will not be subject to the terms of a will and will pass directly to your named beneficiary. Similarly, if you have named a beneficiary on your retirement accounts, including pension plans, individual retirement accounts (IRAs), 401(k) or 403(b) retirement plans, the money will be distributed directly to that named beneficiary when you pass on, regardless of any will provisions.

Brokerage accounts, including stocks and bonds, in which you have named a transfer-on-death (TOD) beneficiary will be transferred directly to the named beneficiary. Vehicles may also be titled with a TOD beneficiary, and would therefore transfer to your beneficiary, regardless of any provisions contained in your will. Similar to TODs, bank accounts may have a pay-on-death beneficiary named.

The will’s shortcomings are not limited to matters of inheritance. Generally, wills are not as well suited as trusts for putting conditions on a gift such as requiring someone to get married or divorced, or obtain a certain education level, as a prerequisite to inheriting a portion of your estate. A simple will cannot reduce estate taxes the way some kinds of trust plans can.

A trust, not a will, is also necessary to arrange for care for a beneficiary who has special needs. A will cannot provide for long-term care arrangements for a loved one. However, a special needs trust can provide financial support for a disabled beneficiary, without risking government disability benefits.

If you want to leave your estate to Fido, you’re out of luck in many states. Without a special pet trust, your will may not be able to provide for pets to inherit your assets. You can use your will to leave your pet to someone, and then leave money to that person in trust to help take care of your pet.

A will cannot help you avoid probate. Assets left through a will generally must be transferred through a court-supervised probate proceeding, which can take months, or longer, at significant expense to your estate. If it’s probate you want to avoid, consider establishing a living trust to hold your significant assets.

 

 

Moving to Another State and How it Affects Estate Planning

In general, wills or living trusts that are valid in one state should be valid in all states. However, if you’ve recently moved, it’s highly recommended that you consult an estate planning attorney in your new state. This is because states can have very different laws regarding all aspects of estate planning. For example, some states may allow you to disinherit a spouse if certain language is used, while other states may not allow it.

Another event that can cause problems with moving and estate planning is moving from a community property state to a common law state or vice versa. In community property states, all property earned or acquired during marriage is generally owned in equal halves by each spouse, with some exceptions, such as any property received by only one of them through gift or inheritance. The property that is considered community property includes income, anything acquired with income during the marriage, and any separate property that is transformed into community property. Separate property includes anything owned by either spouse before marriage, property received by only one spouse by gift or inheritance, and any property earned by one spouse after permanent separation. One spouse is not required in community property states to leave his or her half of the community property to another spouse, although many do.

In common law states, property acquired during a marriage is not automatically owned by both spouses. In common law states, the spouse who earns money and acquires property owns it by himself or herself, unless he or she chooses to share it with his or her spouse. Common law states usually have rules to protect a surviving spouse from being disinherited.

Whether a couple lives in a community property state or a common law state is important for estate planning purposes, because that can directly affect what each spouse is considered to own at death.

If a couple moves from a common law state to a community property state, there are different rules about what happens depending on where you move. If you move from a common law state to California, Washington, Idaho or Wisconsin, the property you bring into the state becomes community property. If you move to another community property state (Alaska, Arizona, New Mexico, Nevada, or Texas), your property ownership won’t automatically change. If a couple moves from a community property state to a common law state, each spouse retains a one-half interest in property accumulated during marriage while they lived in the community property state.

As you can see, the laws of different states vary significantly with respect to incapacity planning, estate planning and inheritance rights. Therefore, it’s important to contact an estate planning attorney in your new area, especially if you are moving from a community property state to a common law state, or vice versa.

Nobody wants to end up in a dump like the Springfield Retirement Castle in The Simpsons or the shady place where Happy Gilmore’s grandma is forced to live and make crafts to sell, but the high cost of long-term care means some people’s options are limited.

AARP’s long term care calculator estimates that the cost of just one year of care in a nursing home in the Virginia Beach area runs over $82,000 if you want a private room. Staying in an assisted living facility will set you back over $39,000 a year, and having a home health care worker stop by for just a few hours a week will cost around $10,000 each year.

These costs add up quickly, and when you consider this doesn’t include medical or pharmaceutical expenses, it is easy to see why even wealthy families struggle to pay for long-term care.

Some people used to be able to prepare for these costs by buying long-term care insurance, but that marketplace is now pretty limited, and very expensive.
Read more . . .

Common Estate Planning Myths

Estate planning is a powerful tool that among other things, enables you to direct exactly how your assets will be handled upon your death or disability. A well-crafted estate plan will ensure you and your family avoid the hassles of guardianship, conservatorship, probate or unpleasant estate tax surprises. Unfortunately, many individuals have fallen victim to several persistent myths and misconceptions about estate planning and what happens if you die or become incapacitated.

Some of these misconceptions about living trusts and wills cause people to postpone their estate planning – often until it is too late. Which myths have you heard? Which ones have you believed?

Myth: I’m not rich so I don’t need estate planning.
Fact: Estate planning is not just for the wealthy, and provides many benefits regardless of your income or assets. For example, a good estate plan includes provisions for caring for a minor or disabled child, caring for a surviving spouse, caring for pets, transferring ownership of property or business interests according to your wishes, tax savings, and probate avoidance.

Myth: I’m too young to create an estate plan.
Fact: Accidents happen. None of us knows exactly when we will die or become incapacitated. Even if you have no assets and no family to support, you should have a power of attorney and health care directive in place, in case you ever become disabled or incapacitated.

Myth: Owning property in joint tenancy is an easier, more affordable way to avoid probate than placing it in a revocable living trust.
Fact: It is true that property held in joint tenancy will pass to the other owner(s) outside of the probate process. However, it is a usually a very bad idea. Placing property in joint tenancy constitutes a gift to the joint tenant, and may result in a sizable gift tax being owed. Furthermore, once the deed is executed, the property is legally owned by all joint tenants and may be subject to the claims of any joint tenant’s creditors. Transferring a property into joint tenancy is irrevocable, unless all parties consent to a future transfer; whereas property owned in a living trust remains under your control and the transfer is fully revocable until your death.

Myth: Keeping property out of probate saves money on federal estate taxes.
Fact: Probate, and probate avoidance, are governed by state law and address how property passes upon your death; they have nothing to do with federal estate taxes, which are set forth in the Internal Revenue Code. Estate planning can reduce estate taxes, but that has nothing to do with a discussion regarding probate avoidance.

Myth: I don’t need a living trust if I have a will.
Fact: A properly drafted trust contains provisions addressing what happens to your property if you become incapacitated. On the other hand, a will only becomes effective upon your death and specifies who will inherit the property. If you own real property, or have more than $100,000 in assets, both a will and a living trust are generally recommended.

Myth: With a living trust, a surviving spouse need not take any action after the other spouse’s death.
Fact: Failure to adhere to the proper legal formalities following a death could result in significant administrative and tax implications. While a properly drafted and funded living trust will avoid probate, there are still many tasks that have to be performed such as filing documents, sending notices and transferring assets.  
 

Typically, when I talk about asset protection I’m talking about preserving wealth by limiting taxes and exposure to liabilities. Today, however, I’m going to take a time out and talk about another kind of threat to your assets that you need to take steps to protect yourself from.

Equifax, one of the big three credit reporting agencies, announced that it has been hacked, putting around 143 million Americans at risk of having their identities stolen.
Read more . . .

 

You’ve Established an Estate Plan. Do You Know Where the Documents Are? Does Your Family?

For most people, finally establishing an estate plan is a big step that they have undertaken after years of delay. A second step is making decisions regarding the executor, trustees, beneficiaries, funeral costs and debt, and a third step is actually completing the will. There is, however, a fourth step that is often skipped: placing the original will and other critical documents in a place where it can be found when it is needed.

As far as wills are concerned, this step is more important than you might think, for two reasons:

1. If your will can’t be found upon your death then, legally, you will have passed away intestate, i.e. without a will.
2. If your loved ones can only locate a photocopy of your will, chances are the photocopy will be ruled invalid by the courts. This is because the courts assume that, if an original will can’t be located, the willmaker destroyed it with the intention of revoking it.

Options for Storing the Original Copy of Your Will

Because an original will is usually needed by the probate court, it makes sense to store it in a strategic location. Common locations recommended by estate planning attorneys include:

• A fireproof safe or lock box
• Stored at the local probate court, if such service is provided.
• A safety deposit box in a bank

There are advantages to each choice. For many, a fireproof safe is simplest: it’s in the home, doesn’t need to leave the house and can be altered and replaced with maximum convenience. The probate court makes sense because it is the place where the last will and testament may end up when you pass away. A safety deposit box also makes sense, especially if you already have one for which you’re paying.  Just make sure that your executor can access it.

By making sure that your original will is safe and can be found when needed, you don’t just ensure that it can be used when the allocation of your assets and debt occurs. You also ensure that disputes, confusion and disappointment don’t occur years after your death; while uncommon, in some cases, by the time the will has been discovered, the assets of the decedent have long been distributed according to intestacy laws and not the decedent’s will. Intestacy laws are essentially the “default will” that the state establishes for individuals who do not have their own estate plan.

You’ve taken the trouble to protect your assets and loved ones by creating an estate plan. Don’t leave its discovery to chance. Ensure that your executor or trustee can easily and reliably find it when it comes time to put it into effect. 

 

Having the ability to give a gift to a loved one is a gift in and of itself. It makes you feel good to know that you are making someone you love happy. It can also be good for your wallet to give generously since gifts are a tax-free way to pass money on to your loved ones.

The biggest downside to gifting is that you might not like what the recipient does with your gift. As a recent question posed to Slate’s advice columnist, “Prudence,” illustrates, it can be heartbreaking when the person you give a gift to squanders it, or acts ungrateful:

Q.
Read more . . .